Art by Daniela Illing.
The Asexual is an independent platform elevating discourse on (a)sexuality, gender, and attraction.
Much of the time we spent together as a group, we talked openly about everything, but when we talked about sex and it was my turn to talk, I lied, a lot.
I’ve learned that, if it is difficult to find someone who can distinguish between the asexual orientation and a lack of genitalia, it is even more difficult to find an accepting mind, someone who doesn’t think of it as an illness to be cured.
The conflation of love with lust is part of what makes it so hard for asexual people to come to terms with their identity, and often makes it nearly impossible to come out or be understood and accepted when we do.
It was incredible to see I was not the only asexual person in the universe, and it filled my heart with a comfort and happiness that I had never felt about my sexuality.
Having gone the entirety of my high school years without feeling any kind of attraction towards anyone, I began to feel isolated from the “normal” adolescent experience and questioned if there was something fundamentally wrong with me, with who I was.
But, to talk about identity is to talk about “the other”: when the critics of the ace pride assume themselves as rightful gatekeepers of the LGBTTTIQ+ community…
We can be proud of ourselves as we are, for just being ourselves, in a world that doesn’t yet understand us.
I assumed that any partner I might find would expect sex from me, and since I wasn’t willing to do that, it felt like it would be ‘leading someone on’ if I tried to date.
Maybe you’ll find the right person…” “Um, I don’t know. I just told you I’m not into that.
Yes, sometimes people really do "just want to cuddle." And sometimes, that is all some of us would like to do.