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The Asexual journal is an independent platform publishing work by asexual, aromantic, and agender authors.

That's What Ze Said

That's What Ze Said

New York Times Headline Jan. 9, 2018

Hetero, cis, old, she.
My world a jumble
with they them ze.
My tongue tangles,
my brain refuses
to reassemble, stumbles,
even if I try, I fall. Don’t tell me,
I will I won’t call you what you ask,
I want to and still
my tongue trips. Mx, hir, xem.
Does everyone know this
but me?

I look for clues: hips,
hair, hands, boy or girl.
Harder to tell now
but I try to guess.
Not my business.
Another’s anatomy.
Who knows how they know
themselves to be. But I
see only two boxes.

My friend: tall, short hair, men’s pants
work boots. Do you go by
they/them
I say, so cool
No, she/her. I don’t wear the pants
in the family. If a mouse
crossed my path
I’d jump into your arms.
I’ve met her partner
all soft and curly—
goes by they/them.
My friend, I can’t un-him her yet.

And the new member
of our women’s retreat. I tried
so hard to say they/
them/their and all week I
screwed it up. I see their
half-shaved hair, knickers and
knee socks but still sense them
as she. We are a woman’s
group after all. How many times did I label
̶h̶e̶r̶ by my definition, not ̶h̶e̶r̶s̶ theirs.

What If I am she/her
and you always refer to me as It. It
looked great last night. Give it a hug for me.
Every time my body says NO, She/her. It’s not
me.      I’m beginning to see. 

My grandson’s sex ed class taught 39
genders, Facebook offers 58.
Gender queer, gender-expansive…

And I, narrow
crammed
into a corner
out of habit.
Maybe
I too am more than She.

Can I open
my arms to them,
 to me?

We Are Whole

We Are Whole

asexual education is important because:

asexual education is important because: